Last Shot, Last Straw

This week marks the first week without any hormone injections to support the pregnancy. Which means this little bean is on autopilot from here on out. I’m not going to lie – it feels nice making it through the day without worrying about who is going to do my shot --or if I’m off schedule --or having to nurse my poor bruised and bumpy rear end.

Yesterday I had my pre-OB appointment with the nurse at the doctor's office. What a colossal waste of time that was… First – I had to take the last 1.5 hours off of work to make it to the office by 3:00pm. Only to have to wait for 25 minutes to sit down and review my health history that was already completed at my new patient appointment back in February (prior to my transfer). The whole reason that I did the appointment in February was to make transitioning as a new OB patient seamless. Overall, she was very nice -- but I could tell that I was just another in a long line of patients to be seen.

“So did you do your transfer at your office?”

“No – I did it in Colorado…at CCRM.” I had already filled out my records release to CCRM to send all records to their office a month ago.

“Oh…well we don’t have any records for you from the clinic.”

So…I filled out another release form. The questions continued... “Are you having nausea?” No. “Bleeding?” No. “Headaches?” No. “Fatigue.” Well…yes but I think it’s because I work two jobs and have a toddler at home. I don’t think there’s any magical cure for that. She laughed. “You’re making my job so easy! You’re the first one all day that hasn’t had any complaints.” I gave her a half-smile. Then she reviewed all of the blood work that will need to be done pending what they receive from CCRM to see if anything is missing (which should have already been noted if they had the records prior).

She then went over the dos and don’ts of pregnancy (no alcohol, no undercooked meat, no saunas, etc.).Here I am – a labor and delivery nurse, a fertility nurse, 10 weeks along with my second pregnancy and I am getting the Sesame Street version of how to take care of a growing fetus all while losing out on money and getting behind on office work. I wish there was an option to take a pre-test and get out of this appointment based on my score.

So I sat and listened - nodding politely throughout. Then she got a call from the front office. A stunned look crossed her face and she hung up the phone.

“So apparently your insurance doesn’t cover anything related to the surrogacy.”

I laughed out loud. “The insurance was purchased specifically for the surrogacy. It was one of the few plans that actually covered treatment.” Now my heart is beating out of my chest. Annoyed at the system – annoyed that no one can look past what’s on the paper and actually rub two brain cells together to form a critical thought.

“Ok we will have to look into it and I’ll call you back later this afternoon.” She then handed me a gift bag filled with coupons for diapers, nursing bras and baby stuff, breast milk storage samples and other new mommy swag. She paused and looked at the contents. “Well, I guess you don’t really need any of this stuff.” No… I don’t need the stuff. I didn’t need this appointment. And I didn’t need this added stress of not knowing the outcome of this insurance ordeal. Instead...what came out was, "Nope, I don't need it - but I'll offer it to the parents. Thank you!" And then I left.

I got a call 30 minutes later from the office saying that they spoke to a different insurance representative that confirmed that Yes…The policy did indeed include surrogacy care.

Is this how we've all become? Assuming all patients are complete ignoramuses? I try not to assume that most patients are completely clueless -- but there are some that need as many hands to hold throughout the process as possible. However, that doesn't mean that I should have to suffer through the standard rigamaorle because someone didn't bother to pay attention to my background and experience. It's an extension of what made me so irritated with Candace at CCRM. Everyone is so busy focusing on just getting through their day - but no one is actually paying attention on a personal level. So far - they only person on this whole journey to treat me like Megan - is Dr. Farringer. He has acknowledged me as a colleague and has never patronized me. I trust him implicitly and he has given me whole-hearted support ever since I picked his brain about this casually six months ago. I am so grateful that he will be on this journey with me. If no one else cares about me in this process...at least I know he does.

Baby Stats:

Gestational Age: 10 weeks 2 days

Size: kumquat

Development: major organs (kidneys, intestines, liver, brain) are fully developed and functioning

Stork Sensations: Like in my nurse appointment (no nausea, no headaches, no bleeding) - so far this is entirely different than my pregnancy with Jacob. Which pokes holes in the old wives tales that carrying a girl makes you more sick in the first trimester.

And for those of you paying attention...yes I did just give away the gender. Officially.